Misery

from by mc∆t

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lyrics

I- Cant remember how to sleep, all these people counting sheep,
But im like, fuck this insomnia, dont bother yah,
So I let the tea bag steep,
In my heart- no my mind,
I’m reluctant to find
A better way for myself, fucking decide to resign,
Sucker built by design, fuck her; guilty cause I,
Know I can do better, so god damnit why,


Am I sitting here, writing this rap?
If I could shit fear I’d be covered in crap,
If I could steer clear of all of these traps,
Setting down cards but nothing to tap,


Mana screwed myself over again,
Self pity, depression: reliable friends
Here I go fucking denying again,
I’m the source of my problems, but I dont know when:


I should change my habits,
I be causing too much havoc,
Procrastinating, masturbating,
Like baby lets just fuck like rabbits.


Like I could really give a fuck,
So good luck, I’m so subtly fucked up,
Rapping bout my mental state,
As if anyone really cares...


And what do I have to complain about?
White kid, privileged to an insane amount
But nothing amounts to anything,
If everything is so damn blistering,
Burning my head like listerine,
Depression is just a damn mystery,
This medicine could just be trickery
Because I’m still floating in misery.


My best friend wants to die,
And so do I, so how damn serpentine
Can this really be? To have such a grasp, just set us free.
The snake in the tree, adam and eve,
Except fuck religion, it's not knowledge that be trippin
Us up, it's our own fucked up, mental shut
downs , ups and around the empty ghost town
All the sad clowns and hollow frowns,
Lifeless mounds, invisible gowns
The crowned melancholy king drowns in his castle
And everything bad in my life is his vassal
They rattle and straddle me up I’m in shackles,
Forcing my wheels right off of their axle,
Making it a hassle just to go and pass through


This Kingdom come, this kingdom went,
I’ve just begun, yet I’ve already spent
This precious time, on Earth we live
Wasting my time, but is it really live -ing If youre
empty inside all these lies that I hide
about how I feel and bout why I decide to
Fuck other women, leave lovers behind
Something good in my life, I reject it cause I

Want you to hurt me, desert me,
Assert me, True or false? You dont deserve me,
Fucking you over again,
Have you came yet? No, so just pretend.
Sadly we already bubbled in,
All the wrong answers, it's past us,
Dead and no head romancers,
Resurrection would be nice but
We aint necromancers.


I'm a good person (False)
I'm still doing alright (False)
It’ll get better (False)
I really hate myself (True)

credits

from Ghosts (Volume 1), released January 7, 2017

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mc∆t California

i make beats i guess

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